Random Encounters
by Twilight Joltik
Summary: Peach finds a certain online meme and turns it into a rather odd game for her "friends" to play. Twelve of the Smashers must watch as they get thrown into crazy and often embarrassing hypothetical situations that have the potential to get rather destructive and insanity-inducing. Also, literal shipping wars! Reboot of Ten Random Characters.
1. Twelve-Player Smash?

_**AN- Does anyone remember that Ten Random Characters story I wrote a while back? Well, I was thinking re-reading it the other day, and I decided I sort of regretted cutting it off, but I didn't want to just pick back up where I left off because it kind of sucked in places, so I decided to reboot it! It will have the same concept and plot structure, but with a bit better put together characters and character interactions, I hope. I promise I will try not to bring crazy dimensional conspiracies into this, but I do not promise the Norfair Alley will remain unbroken. The questions used are mostly from Zelda12343 and numbuh-15-fangirl on DeviantArt, but I might add more, and submissions are welcome but not guaranteed to be used. Also, my dear friend AngeloHeroOfLight came up with the title for me, so thanks to him. So, I only own my own ideas, thank you, and please, enjoy! –Twilight Joltik**_

* * *

 _Random Encounters_

 _Chapter One- Twelve-Player Smash?_

Peach sat in an empty room, one of an uncountable multitude in the Smash Mansion. All the people she'd invited for her game, would any of them come? Anxiously, she kept her eyes fixated on the doorknob, and her heart leapt as it turned and the door was shoved open. That surge of joy quickly soured when she realized who it was, though.

"Miss Robin, I did not invite you here," she coolly stated, narrowing a glare and bearing it into the tactician's many-eyed cloak.

Robin replied with a small smirk. "Oh, don't worry, I'm not gonna play," she explained as she sat down on a wooden stool in the corner of the room. "I just want to watch you and make sure you don't get a leg up on our game."

A deep sigh escaped the princess. "Alright, I suppose it's best I keep you where I can see you anyways," she countered.

Neither exchanged another word, for they were too deep in thought. Peach was making notes on the several pages she'd printed off for her game, while Robin was making notes in a thick leather-bound tome labeled "Shipping and Shipping By-Products". This was not a title she had ever explained to anyone, not even her son, who she had taught all of her war tactics including supports, but many presumed the "Shipping By-Products" part meant children.

Minutes passed, and Peach was roused from her last-minute revisions by Palutena literally bursting into the room in a spray of light. Once the goddess seemed to realize her display was for such a small audience, she sat down quietly next to Peach.

Pit, as always, closely followed his goddess, smiling brightly. Also as always, Ike and Marth arrived in a pair. Peach was a bit annoyed when she noted Roy was not with them, but tried to shrug it off. Sure, she'd expected him to come, but it was to be expected some would decline her invitation, right?

One person she would have very much expected to decline it, however, arrived shortly after. Lucas, who was acting as uncomfortable as one would expect in such a large group, wasn't normally one to participate in social events. Peach had only sent him an invitation to be polite, but to be honest, she was pleasantly surprised to see him. However, trailing him was a rather nasty one.

Rosalina, the person Peach probably hated the most was accompanying the young psychic. The space freak smiled kindly and waved at her, like she didn't know that Peach knew exactly why she would play nice around her. Clenching her fists, she tried to ignore Rosalina and hope that she wouldn't end up ruining everything.

Luckily, the dreadful shock of seeing her was quickly banished by the entrance of another she didn't expect in the least to see: Dark Pit. He looked somewhere between bored and annoyed, as always, and was closely trailed by both the male Robin and Shulk. Shulk? Things only got stranger, as she hadn't invited the seer, for she'd feared the female Robin would accuse her of foul play in their own game if she'd invited every single piece in play. He failed to acknowledge the fact of his intrusion, sitting down next to the tactician, who was exchanging an odd look with the dark-winged angel on his other side, as if an unspoken pact was running between them.

(That was absolutely true, but neither she nor anyone but the other Robin knew that at the time. She also failed to notice the bag Robin had stuffed into his cloak, much to her later chagrin.)

The room was really starting to fill up, and Peach was beginning to look forward to what she had planned even more. Only a few players were lacking, and one of them quietly slipped in and took her seat next to Dark Pit. Peach had to wonder why Lucina seemed to have chosen deliberately to be as far from her ancestor as the room would allow, but didn't think too much on it, as someone she hadn't expected to come entered not a moment later.

Link was probably, besides Dark Pit, the last person she would have expected to show. In fact, she and practically everyone else openly gaped at him when he entered the room and sat pretty much as not-close to anyone as he could. (Next to Marth, but considering the prince was practically on Ike's lap, there was plenty of space between the two.) The Hylian looked around nervously before turning to her, his hair catching the light in a way she would never admit she would gladly swoon over, and muttered "Um, Zel' said she wouldn't be here and to tell you she's sorry about that..."

For a moment, she almost felt bad about asking Link to be there. He seemed so uneasy among them, even more so than Lucas. It seemed a bit odd to her, given how confident he seemed in battle and with Zelda or his smaller double, but she supposed most people tended to act differently in battle. Heck, it had taken her quite a while to wrap her head around the fact that the brash, one-line-spouting Shulk she often faced was the same as the quiet, awkward boy who frequented the library.

After doing a quick once-over of the room and checking her list once more, she realized two things. Firstly, all she'd invited were either there or confirmed absent, given what Link has said, the fact Roy would have been with Marth if he were coming at all, and how Mario had told her he was "busy" that night, and second, there seemed to be twelve players rather than the ten she'd expected. Scribbling out a revised list, she cursed Rosalina under her breath for contributing to her having to rewrite the rules a bit.

She was snapped out of this anger-fueled revision by Pit raising his hand, as if expecting to be called on by his teacher. "Yes, Pit?", she said as she looked up.

"What exactly are we all here for?", the angel quickly questioned. "I mean, your invitation thingies just said something about a game, so…"

A smirk came to the princess's face. "Ah, yes," she began. "I saw this game on someone's Fanfiction profile-" A collective groan came from practically every male in the room. "and I thought it would be a fun thing for us to play. So, there's this list of, well it was ten, but…" She paused for a moment to glare at Rosalina, who didn't seem to notice it at all.

After a moment, the pause became painfully awkward and Marth cast an odd glance at her and prompted "Go on."

"Yes, so I had to revise it for twelve players," Peach continued, still waiting for Rosalina to notice her glare. "Basically, I read off scenarios with each person's number, and the people with that number have to say what they'd do in that situation."

She was met with a very confused "Huh?" from an indeterminable source, though the Smashers' faces showed they all were thinking it.

After thinking for a moment, Peach could totally see why they were so perplexed. "Yeah, I guess I need to demonstrate. So, let's say, um, number one was Pit and number two was Palutena. So, number one and number two discover a secret cave. What do they do?"

"Woo!", Pit cheered. "I'm number one!" His joy made Peach hastily make another revision to the game, switching Pit to the number one spot for real.

"Yes, but what would you do?", Peach prompted.

The angel seemed to think deeply about it for a moment before arriving on something. "I know! I'd make it into a super cool secret base! We can have cool lights and a couch and a boat and-"

"I think we should make it into a dungeon for unsuspecting explorers!", Palutena suggested. "Just think, we could put all sorts of enemies and death traps and maybe a mini boss. Probably should put some sort of treasure at the end too, like an empty bottle or something."

Pit gave a small frown. "I liked my idea better," he muttered.

"Okay!", Peach cut them off, hoping it wouldn't become a squabble. "Now that we get the point, I'll assign numbers and we'll get started!"

* * *

 _ **AN- Number assignments here:**_

 _ **1- Pit**_

 _ **2- Ike**_

 _ **3- Lucas**_

 _ **4- Lucina**_

 _ **5- Palutena**_

 _ **6- Marth**_

 _ **7- Peach**_

 _ **8- Robin**_

 _ **9- Dark Pit**_

 _ **10- Link**_

 _ **11- Shulk**_

 _ **12- Rosalina**_

 _ **Tried not to give anyone the same number as last time, but if I accidentally did, sorry. Also, I'm sure the characters that were cut from the last one will show up at some point… So, thanks for reading! –Twilight Joltik**_


	2. Salty Shulk is Salty

_Random Encounters_

 _Chapter 2- Salty Shulk is Salty_

After Peach finished assigning numbers, pointedly making Rosalina last, she shuffled her papers and read off the first scenario. "Seven, er," she glanced back at her notes to confirm who seven was before turning red in the realization it was herself. "I kidnap um, Ike and, uh, demand something from Palutena for his release. What is it?"

She didn't even have time to think of an answer before Ike butted in. "Why are you using me to negotiate with the goddess lady? Wouldn't you be better off using Pit or something if you wanted her to care?"

Palutena opened her mouth to protest, but after a strained moment, closed it once more and nodded. "Yeah, I don't really think I'd particularly care about bargaining for your safety."

"But he's my friend!", Pit protested. "C'mon, he's like, fifth on my best friends list after you and Megaman and Samus and Shulk! Well, and Pittoo." His dark clone proceeded to glower at him from across the room. "But I guess he doesn't like me calling him that," Pit hastily added. "Er, both things, not Pittoo or my friend. What was I talking about again?"

"About freeing me from Peach?", Ike provided. As Pit exclaimed "Oh, right!", the mercenary muttered "Fifth-slash-sixth best friend? Gee, thanks Pit," under his breath, not an ounce of sincerity present in the words.

The goddess of light shrugged, showing her great care for the mortals and denizens of the world. "Eh, I would consider Megaman or Samus, but I draw the line at Pittoo and the swordy guy- uh, what was his name, like, Salt or something?"

Glaring daggers at Palutena, Dark Pit snarled at her while Shulk facepalmed and the male Robin snickered. This, however, didn't seem to phase Palutena, as she loudly laughed and said "What, is someone a bit… _salty_ about me forgetting their name?"

It took Salt, er, Shulk punching him in the stomach to stop Robin's laughter and Lucina casting a glare at him to prevent Dark Pit from joining in on said laughter. Amidst the laughter, Peach loudly cleared her throat in an attempt to get the game back on track. "Alright, so, I think if I were bargaining with Ike's life with Palutena, I'd probably be asking for, um, well, I don't know. I mean, I don't have anything against you except…" She trailed off and her eyes shot wide open, like a cartoony lightbulb had just lit up above her head. (A lightbulb relatively above her head had flickered at almost the same exact time, but that was irrelevant.) "Well, I guess I would like you to apologize for a certain incident that occurred last April Fools Day."

Palutena laughed and bore a vacant look in her eyes, fondly remembering the first of that April. "Which one?", she finally questioned after a moment. "The posters or the loudspeaker?"

"The loudspeaker," Peach flatly declared. "I mean, the posters were pretty funny, and I appreciate you made fun of pretty much everyone, but don't you agree blasting Groose's Theme at full blast through every speaker in the mansion for ten hours straight was a bit much?"

"Not at all!", Palutena cheerily declared. "I thought that was one of my best ones! Besides, it goes with anything, doesn't it?"

Everyone groaned. "Palutena, that was maybe the worst welcome I have ever gotten anywhere ever," Lucas said. "And I've been welcomed by many a killer Chimera in my day. And mushrooms."

"Killer mushrooms?", Pit questioned. "Don't remember that part."

Lucas shook his head. "No, just regular mushrooms."

"Well, I don't think that prank warrants an apology," Palutena plainly stated. "If anything, you should be thanking me for stopping Donkey Kong and Diddy Kong's plan to play the DK Rap over the loudspeakers twelve hours."

A quieted hush fell over the room as they realized that their afternoon of auditory agony could have been approximately twenty three times worse. "Yeah, that's not worth betting my life over an apology for," Ike conceded.

That question seemed to have come to a close. Peach gave a small sigh of relief- it was going so well!- and read out her next question. "Four, er, Lucina invites… Lucas and Robin over to her house for dinner. What happens?"

"First question: who's cooking?", Robin inquired.

Lucina's cheeks became flushed with embarrassment. "Ah, my mother, I'd imagine."

The female Robin looked at the Ylissean princess and raised a hood-covered eyebrow. "Your mother, she isn't… Sully, is she?"

Both Lucina and Robin shivered at the prospect of Sully cooking for people. "Oh gods, no," Lucina assured her. "Olivia's my mother."

"Oh, thank goodness!" Female Robin let out a sigh of relief. "Sully would be an awful choice to marry Chrom; you couldn't even get Galeforce. Olivia's a good option, though. Good skill to compliment Rightful King, and you do well with Astra. Sully's better off with Donnel or Gaius, but considering Nah and Noire can benefit more from Galeforce, they're pro-"

"Okay, other me, I think that's enough on eugenics for today," interrupted the male Robin. "Olivia is a pretty good cook, though, so I guess there's nothing culinary for us to fear."

Lucas still looked a bit uneasy. "No matter how nice Olivia is, that doesn't make up for Inigo…", he muttered, and Lucina quickly clenched her fists and assumed a rather fake smile.

"Oh, my brother's a fine person once you get past all his showmanship," she assured the psychic through gritted teeth. "Really, he's very impersonal and quiet in person!"

She kept that clenched-teeth grin on her face for far too long after she'd stopped talking. "Lucina, are you alright?", Marth finally asked after a moment.

"I am perfectly fine!", Lucina practically shouted in response.

An awkward moment of silence passed before Peach decided it was probably time to move on. "Okay, so Salt, er, I mean Shulk has to stay at a friend's house for the night. Does he choose Pit's or Marth's?"

Salt groaned. "My name is Shulk. That is my name. It is not Salt. Stop calling me that or-"

Dark Pit smirked. "What are you really not feeling i-"

He was halted from finishing his overquoted taunt by Shulk calmly getting up, walking behind the couch, and using the Monado to stab the dark angel in the back. The seer then sat back down without a word as Dark Pit turned into a trophy and face-planted on the carpet.

It took a moment for the seer to acknowledge the fact that Pit was gaping at him. "What?", Shulk questioned rather nonchalantly for someone who had just murdered his roommate.

"How- how did you do that?", Pit practically gasped.

"What, kill him?", Shulk questioned as Lucina tapped Dark Pit's trophy's base to revive him, shifting her glare between the angel and his assailant. "I just used my forward smash and-"

"No, I mean how did you kill a person!", Pit clarified loudly. "I mean, that's clearly the Monado I, so you shouldn't be able to kill people, only machines and monsters! It doesn't look like the Monado II, let alone the Monado III, so how can you do that?"

The Homs seer simply shrugged. "I don't really know. I guess it's for the same reason we turn into trophies when we die and don't, well, die; it's just how this world works."

"Besides," Marth added. "He regularly hurts people with it in battle, so why is it you're only questioning it now?"

"Well, I can see how it could launch people, but it shouldn't be able to kill them!", Pit protested. "That's, like, really not how it worked in Xenoblade Chronicles!"

Deciding to intervene, Peach quickly exclaimed "Shulk, please choose someone to spend the night with!"

"Um…" Shulk placed his hand to his chin, eyes darting between the prince and angel. "Well, a minute ago I would have said Pit without hesitation, but I'm sort of annoyed with him now, but I guess I don't really know Marth, so I guess still him."

Pit said no more, but crossed his arms and glowered in a manner that made him nearly indistinguishable from his dark twin across the room in any way but coloration.

* * *

 _ **AN- For those who haven't played Xenoblade Chronicles, Shulk's sword initially can't kill people, but gets an upgrade at some point that allows him to and changes its appearance a bit, hence why Pit knew it wasn't upgraded. I shall say no more, as I am actually not far enough in the game myself to know the circumstances of the upgrade. Don't worry, I'll only explain the joke if it's super obscure. Also, I'm opening a poll on my profile page of who Female Robin should be married to from her game, so go check that out. Thanks for reading! –Twilight Joltik**_


	3. And now, a Pizza Party

_Random Encounters_

 _Chapter 3- And now, a Pizza Party._

Hoping to lessen Pit's dour mood, Peach flipped around in her wad of papers until she found a question with his number on it. She smiled slightly as she read it. "Okay! Pit and Ike are out hiking, but they get lost. What happens next?"

"Camping? With Ike? Awesome!" Pit exclaimed. "Ooh, we can look at the stars and eat canned beans and make smores and after we run out of marshmallows we can dare each other to eat canned bean smores!"

"Sounds like fun!", Ike agreed. "And I could so eat more canned bean smores than you!"

Marth gave a worried frown. "Graham crackers, chocolate, and canned beans? That really doesn't sound like a good idea. And I believe Peach said hiking, not camping."

"Same thing," Ike countered with a teasing smirk. "You hike places to camp there, right? And either way, I'm sure if it was long enough that we got lost, the need would arise for us to set up camp."

As if to protest, the prince opened his mouth, but nothing came out and he closed it again with an annoyed huff. Meanwhile, Pit loudly exclaimed "Woo! Camping with Ike!"

"Well, it may be camping, but the point of the question was that you got lost, not that you were having an enjoyable time!", protested Marth. "You would undoubtedly run out of beans and smores in due time."

"Then we can order a pizza!", Pit said. "Or just get Palutena to pick us up. Either way works."

Making a vague noise between a hiss and a growl, Marth turned to Ike and cried "You're missing the point! The point is I want you to be careful!"

"And you're missing the point where it says this is a hypothetical question," Ike countered. "Besides, like Pit said, we could just get Palutena to pick us up or bring us pizza."

As Palutena dryly added "I'm not bringing you pizza," and Marth let out a defeated sigh before scooting even closer to Ike, a brilliant idea occurred to Peach.

"Hey, you know, we should order pizza!", the princess decreed. "I mean, it's not a party without pizza!"

This was decided instantaneously and unanimously to be a good thing, and quite possibly the best idea Peach had thought up in her entire existence. She was very proud of herself for about five seconds until she realized something very important: pizzas cost money. "Um, we'll need to all pitch in to order, though," she added with a nervous titter. "So, if everyone gets half a pizza with two or so toppings, that adds up to, er, Salt?"

Shulk rolled his eyes, but the way he seemed to be muttering numbers under his breath assured her he was working on the calculations. "About two hundred coins," he exclaimed after a moment.

Nearly everyone either quickly reached into their pockets to produce said contribution or got up and went to go get their pocketbooks. And by nearly everyone, of course, that means everyone except Lucas, who stayed firmly put and looked a bit annoyed by the whole ordeal.

"Do you not want any?", Ike questioned. "Or are you just broke?"

The young psychic gave a pained chuckle before looking down nervously. "Honestly, I just don't l-"

He was quickly cut off by Rosalina striding calmly towards Ike with a sort of serenely furious glare fixed upon him. "He refuses to utilize money," she explained slowly with clenched fists. "Considering what introducing it did to his home, can you blame him from shying away from the concept?"

Looking away from both, Ike's cheeks burned crimson with embarrassment. "Ah, right," the Radiant Hero muttered. "Forgot about that. Sorry."

"I'd be happy to pay for him!", Palutena quickly volunteered. She turned to Lucas, who still seemed to be deeply contemplating the carpet, and added "Well, I mean, if that's okay with you."

A bright smile spread across the psychic's face. "That would be nice. Thank you!"

"So you have a problem with using money yourself, but not a problem with other people paying for you?", inquired Lucina. "But are those not the same thing?"

Lucas gave a small shrug. "Well, one's using something solely for your own benefit and the other's using something to be kind to someone else, so no, not really."

And so everyone left Lucas alone as Peach collected the cash for the pizza and then pulled up the website of the closest pizza place on her phone. "Okay, everyone gets like, half a pizza, so what does everyone want?"

All at once, people shouted out their orders, leaving Peach to frantically write them down:

"Just pepperoni is fine."

"I'd prefer plain cheese, myself."

"Yeah, just cheese. Lots of it."

"I'm in the mood for something interesting. I'll take Canadian bacon and pineapple."

"I like extra cheese and onions!"

"Extra ch- no, absolutely not. I'm gonna have like, sausage and less cheese."

"Whatever's fine, just no vegetables."

"Oh Gods, please no vegetables."

"Do they have bear meat?"

"Whichever one has the most meat, don't care which it is."

As Peach finished writing the orders down, she took a quick glance at the menu and found that bear meat was not among the options, like a normal restaurant. "No, Robin, they do not have bear meat," she dryly stated.

"Aww," whined both Robins simultaneously. "Um, sausage, then," the male one amended.

Peach read back through the list as she put in the orders to assure she hadn't missed anyone. "Okay, I'm one short," she said after a moment. "Um, Link, I think you forgot to order."

"R-right!", the Hylian exclaimed. "I want, um, what was it Pit said again, onions and cheese or something? That sounded good."

Pit looked a bit annoyed by Link's similar order. (Peach didn't get why Pit so adamantly wanted to always outdo Link, or why that would ever apply to pizza. Her best understanding was that he was jealous of him in some way, but that always seemed a bit petty for the normally cheery Pit.) "Sure rip me off…", he muttered under his breath. "Can I change it to what Pittoo is having?"

"No," Dark Pit flatly replied. "No you cannot. Also, stop calling me that."

"But 'Dark Pit isn't a name!", Pit protested. "Pittoo at least sounds like one."

His dark twin snarled at him, and Link looked rather hurt by Pit's show of rivalry.

"Um, I'll just get a full one of onions and extra cheese," she decreed. "Whoever wants it can have it. Um, Rosalina, do you mind having extra cheese on yours? And Marth, do you mind having less cheese? I don't think you can have differing amounts of cheese on the same pizza."

Both replied politely with "No, not at all," and as Peach inserted the orders, she became aware that she had an extra half pizza. As party host, she decided it was her right to take that, so she keyed in a whole mushroom pizza into the order form. After all, no one else would want it, as prior pizza-ordering experiences back home had shown.

"Okay!", she loudly exclaimed as she finished putting everything in. "They should be here in about half an hour, so until then, let's keep playing!"

There was a much less enthusiastic reaction to that than she would have hoped.

* * *

 _ **AN- The question used in this chapter is from DarkX the Dragon Knight's profile, and they have like, a whole blank thing on their profile if you want to check it out and do it for yourself. I'll be using quite a few of theirs in this, so thanks to them for not forgetting to be awesome! Also, if anyone wants to try and guess who ordered what pizza, you're welcome, and will probably find out if you were right in a few chapters when they arrive. So, thanks for reading! –Twilight Joltik**_

 _ **PS, Lucas's stance on technology and money is an apology for how in the last fic he was constantly on his phone do to me not being aware of how technology ruined his life. Please forgive me Mother 3 fans.**_


	4. The Rise of Our Boy

_Random Encounters_

 _Chapter Four- The Rise of Our Boy_

"Okay, Lucas tries to learn how to play the guitar," Peach read off. "Does this work?"

The young psychic simply shrugged. "I- I don't know. I don't think I've ever tried."

"I'm sure you could if you tried," Rosalina exclaimed encouragingly. "A boy as clever as yourself could do anything he set his mind to, I'd imagine."

Lucas turned a furious crimson in embarrassment, but held his tongue as to not hurt Rosalina's feelings. Peach, however, didn't hold her tongue in the slightest, but no one could hear her raging over Lucas's blushing. Because blushing clearly produces a sound intense enough to block out princesses cursing. Really, it's more likely that everyone ignored her because they were used to it and-

"Yeah, we get the point!", Dark Pit yelled at the narrator. "No one gives a *CRACKERS* about-"

He cut himself off in stunned revelation of what he'd just said, brought on by scattered snickers throughout the room. After punching Shulk and elbowing the male Robin, he said, with great exasperation "It just censored me. I was going to say *CRACKERS*, but it changed it to crackers and-"

After a moment, he seemed to realize it had happened again, and facepalmed. "And it did it again," he groaned.

Suddenly, a great cracking sound came from the wall, the fourth one, to be precise, and a small, white, glowing sliver appeared on it. A collective hush fell over everyone, even Pittoo.

"Don't call me that!", the dark angel yelled at the narrator, and the crack grew a bit larger.

With a squeak of terror, Marth quickly ordered "Stop that! Don't acknowledge it, or it'll make things worse!"

Somehow, Dark Pit refrained from his normal cry of "I'm not taking orders from you!", or anything at all to that effect. Even he seemed to know opening the Norfair Alley wasn't worth his pride. Instead, he muttered under his breath "Okay, next question."

Peach cleared her throat in an obvious attempt to ignore the terrifying crack in the wall. "Ah, yes, um, Lucina is invited to Palutena's house. Why?"

The laugh Palutena gave at this was terrifying, especially considering how Peach knew her goddess mind operated and the game she was playing with the female Robin that she probably knew about somehow. The words that followed were, as expected, a direct blow to said game. "Oh, probably one of the Pits invited her home," she teasingly proposed, and then turned to Lucina, whose eyebrows were questioningly raised. "Don't worry about me approving of you, though. He'd be lucky to have such a sweet girlfriend."

All at once, Lucina turned bright red and emitted a high-pitched noise, Pit let out an indignant cry, and Dark Pit attempted to hide his blushing as he cried out "That-that's not-!"

"Dear Me, calm down! I'm just kidding!", the goddess said with a laugh. "Still," she looked between Pit and Lucina. "I don't really think you're Pit's type. Pittoo, maybe, but not my captain."

While Pit sighed, and Lucina and Dark Pit blushed harder and avoided eye contact as much as possible, a thought occurred to Peach. Was Palutena trying to ship Lucina and Dark Pit, she wondered. She made a mental note of this threat to her winning the game, and also one to make sure that Robin hadn't enlisted Palutena against her.

"Next question!", Peach quickly cried. "Marth wants to go on a rollercoaster, but is too short to ride. What now?"

Marth chuckled. "Me, too short to ride? Oh, come on, that's silly, I'm like, the second tallest Fire Emblem representative!"

A sinister voice came from the shadow-cast doorway, carrying a twinge of annoyance. "Third tallest, actually," corrected Roy as he stepped through the threshold of madness, shutting the door behind him softly. "I mean, it's not by much, but I'm taller than you now."

"Roy!", Lucas greeted with a bright smile. "I- I thought you weren't coming!"

The red-haired lord sat down on the arm of the couch Ike and Marth were pretty much cuddled up on, falling between Ike and Lucas. "Sorry I'm late," he apologized. "Sort of got distracted and lost track of time."

If there was ever a time for Peach to dislike Rosalina, it was then, for she was messing up the game's roster now than an actual invited person was there instead of her uninvited self. "Well, now that Roy's here," voiced the princess as she glared at the space lady. "We don't seem to have a slot left in the game for him. However, given Shulk and Rosalina are uninvited-"

"Wait, there were invitations?", questioned the seer. "I- uh, sorry," he turned a deep crimson to rival Dark Pit and Lucina. "I just figured you were just supposed to show up. I can leave if I'm messing things up!"

Robin (the male one) grabbed his wrist before he could make another motion. "You're not getting out of this!", the tactician affirmed. "If me and Mr. Ow the Edge over here have to suffer through this, then so do you!"

Shulk gave a small chuckle. "Okay, fine. But Roy, you can have my position if you'd like."

"Nah, I can just watch," said Roy.

"Lovely, but I have one slight issue with this," Marth stated. "You are, in fact, shorter than I am, and not the other way around as you claim."

Roy shook his head. "No, I've grown a lot since Melee. I'm pretty sure I'm taller now."

"No, I am still taller than you."

"Wanna bet?", proposed the red-head with a cocky grin.

"That seems rather unprofessional," Marth replied before assuming a similarly confident grin. "Shortest has to clean our room?"

"Deal."

The two quickly stood back-to back, and it did seem Marth was a bit taller. However, this was easily due to the fact that Marth was wearing his fancy boots, while Roy was wearing slippers. "Take off your shoes," ordered Lucina. "That seems more fair."

The two did so, with Marth taking far longer, and then stood such once more, each trying to straighten themselves out as much as possible.

"Still hard to tell," Ike remarked. "Roy, your hair is sticking up too much."

Looking at the mercenary with an expression clearly reading "Seriously?", he made an attempt to flatten his hair, causing it to poof back up instantly. He tried this several more times, but to no avail.

And then, almost simultaneously, both Robins looked as if a cartoon lightbulb had gone off in their heads. (The lights hadn't flickered, oddly, given they did that pretty much all the time.) The male Robin whispered something in Shulk's ear, and the Homs seer quickly rushed out the door.

Lucas looked concernedly at the two tacticians. "What are you guys planning?", he questioned.

They both stood up, exchanged a look, and the female one started talking. "Ah, you see, I-"

"We!", corrected the male one.

"Yes, we came up with a brilliant idea of how to truly determine which of them is the tallest without being thrown off by matters of hair craziness."

Both lords audibly gulped. "I don't really like the sound of that," Marth muttered, still attempting to stand taller than Roy.

"Oh, it's nothing painful," assured the female Robin. "Just-"

At that very instant, Shulk came rushing back in the room carrying a bucket. "Water dump!", he called as he poured a rather lot of water onto Marth and Roy's head. While it certainly made their hair lay flat, it also got all over the carpet.

"-a bit cold!", finished the male Robin. "Thanks, Shulk. I'll go get towels."

"You'd better," growled Roy.

Palutena suddenly stood up and walked up to the shivering lords, looking closely between them. "Yeah, Marth is a little taller," she concluded.

While Marth punched the air in victory, Roy groaned and wrapped his arms around himself in an attempt to mitigate the chill of the water.

* * *

 _ **AN- I can't keep calling them male and female Robin. Please, I need to decide which to call Reflet, so yell at me in reviews about it!**_

 _ **In other news, I did serious research to determine who was taller. And by that, I mean I went in training mode and tried to get them to stand as close together as I could, and after a minute of staring at them, decided Marth was probably taller by a few pixels. Also, the fourth wall once again proves to be our deadliest enemy! Please, Dark Pit, just ignore me and don't doom everyone! Thanks for reading! -Twilight Joltik**_


	5. There is a Steven Universe reference

_Random Encounters_

 _Chapter Five- There is a Steven Universe reference_

As Marth and Roy sat back down, the towels Robin (the male one) had brought them acting as a cocoon to absorb the damage of their competition, Peach read off the next question. "Okay, Salt and I are robbing a bank. Do we succeed?"

"Well," started Shulk, who didn't even seem to notice his misnaming. "That all depends on how we go about it. If we go in all frying-pans ablaze, we'd probably get shot down pretty quickly. I mean, we're fairly powerful, yes, but not the most defensive unless I had Monado Shield up, and even then, that fades pretty quickly. If we were to go about this, we'd have to be stealthy."

A grin spread across the pink princess's face. "Stealthy, you say?"

Shulk gave a nod and a knowing grin. "Yeah, you can bust out the Sneaky Parasol to pose as a guard, and then wait until the coast is clear and signal me, and I'll run in and get the money. If any other guards notice me, I can use Shadow Eye to divert their aggro from me, and you can be there and assure them it's nothing. Then, I'll run as far away as I can before they catch me, and whenever you can get away, you can meet me someplace arranged before hand. Then with that money or whatever we stole, we can conquer the world!"

He laughed a bit maniacally before sheepishly adding "Er, or at least the supermarket. Dunno how much money we were going for there."

Quite a few people stared at the seer for a moment before Lucina finally spoke up. "Um, that seems rather… elaborate. Did you make that up on the spot?"

"Eh, I think so," Salt affirmed with a shrug, trying very hard to resist the urge to chastise the narrator for the misnomer. "I mean, Robin and I think up things like that all the time and try to think of the best way to do it. It's fun, actually, but I always lose."

Robin (the female one) raised an eyebrow. "I don't remember tha- oh." She nervously laughed her mistake off as Robin (the male one) facepalmed.

"Don't be so hard on yourself," reassured the male Robin with a smile directed at Sa- er, Shulk. "You don't always lose. It's more like you lose eight times out of eleven!"

"Yes, and that makes me feel vastly less bad about my cleverness," muttered Shulk under his breath.

Peach sighed. "Well, either way, I like your plan," she told the seer. "It sounds really fun, actually. If it wasn't completely illegal, I'd say we should totally do that, but- wait, does anyone know if Bowser has a bank?"

"Please don't Peach. An eye for an eye makes the whole world into Waddle Doos, I've told you this!", Marth chastised. "Besides, if it fails, you'd end up getting yourself jailed for real this time, and not just kidnapped."

Though Peach opened her mouth to protest, Marth interrupted with "Also, you really shouldn't get uninvolved parties caught up in your own political matters."

"Come on, that's what Regina Ferox does!", Peach protested. "Besides, it's not like Mario wouldn't save me in a few hours of running and jumping!"

Robin (the female one) laughed. "Yeah, whenever Flavia and Basilio have a problem, they just call up Chrom. Wars, power struggles, civil unrest, Risen infestation, wolf infestation, wolf-riding Risen infestation- you name it, they get us to do it."

"Yes, and they are also pretty much the worst late-game units ever," Ike added. "Really, Peach, don't be like Flavia and Basilio."

The mushroom princess puffed up her cheeks and frowned. "Aw, that's a shame," she complained. "I was starting to think how fun that'd be. Well, next question, I guess. Er," She read off the list and chuckled as she did so. "Robin wakes up to find themselves chewing on Dark Pit's leg." Unexpectedly, the dark angel cringed as this was read. "How do they react?"

"Well, I would for one wonder why I fell asleep anywhere near Ow the Edge's leg," started the Female Robin.

Almost growling, Dark Pit cried "You're not even playing! And I am not Shadow the Hedgehog!"

As the Female Robin muttered "Could have fooled me…" under her breath, Peach suddenly realized something. Referring to both Robins as the same thing was getting to be really confusing and too much trouble.

She quickly voiced this. Quickly, Pit raised his hand as if expecting to be called on once more, but didn't wait to be called on before speaking, just like most school children. "We could always call one of them Reflet!", suggested the light angel.

Reflet, yes, that would work. "But," Peach's eyes flitted between the male Robin, whose arms were crossed, and the female Robin, who was jotting something down in her book of Shipping and Shipping By-Products. "Which one would be Reflet?"

When neither Robin volunteered, Lucas took a Franklin Badge off his shirt and tossed it at Peach. "Here, you can flip this to decide," he offered. "The side with the lightning bolt can mean the girl one is Reflet, and the side with the metal can mean the guy one is Reflet."

Peach accepted this with a nod and threw it in the air, despite both Robins' protests. It landed on the carpet, and upon getting up to look at it, definitely landed pin-side up. "Um, I think that means you're Reflet," she declared as she picked up the badge, pointing at a rather cross male tactican.

"Oh, come on!", complained the newly-christened Reflet. "I'm the original! Lucina's from my world, Chrom's from my world, and our amiibo is of me! I should keep our name!"

Robin gave a pouting frown. "Aw, but my family's going to visit in a few days!", she protested. "Just think how confused Inigo would be if everyone was calling me some random name!"

"It's not like it's going to stick!", countered Reflet, ignoring how the narrator had already decided it was his name.

Palutena butted in with "Well, 'Salt' certainly will."

The two tacticians probably would have argued over that and their name for a while longer had Lucina not suddenly realized what Robin had said. "Wait, what do you mean, Inigo's visiting?", she questioned, suddenly looking rather pale.

"Don't worry, he's not your Inigo. I mean, he's still Chrom's son, but he's a different Lucina's brother not yo-"

"That isn't what I meant!", exclaimed the Ylissean princess. "You said your family was coming, what do you mean by that in relation to my brother!"

Suddenly, Robin looked bashfully away. "Uh, I didn't tell you?"

"Tell me what?", Lucina asked, looking very faint and nauseous.

"I'm married to Inigo," Robin explained.

If it wasn't for the fact that Dark Pit was gripping her arm, Lucina probably would have passed out on the spot. Instead, she managed to stick around for an "E-excuse me?"

With a girlish giggle and blush, Robin began talking very quickly. "See, we got to be close friends and he would always try to ask me out to tea, but I tried to tell myself it didn't mean anything and I started getting jealous when he'd flirt with other girls and then one thing led to another and oh, he's just the sweetest and cares so much about me and Morgan! I've missed him so much here, but he makes me happier than anything!"

Two things became quickly evident in the room: Lucina's eye twitch, and Reflet's seething jealousy. "Get over yourself, no one wants to hear about your marital bliss," the male tactician snipped.

"You're just mad 'cause you're single!", retaliated Robin.

Reflet grimaced and produced his Elwind tome. "Oh, we'll see how happy you are after this!"

"Bring it!", Robin cried, brandishing her Bronze Sword.

Oddly enough, they seemed to be hit by more of the other Smasher's attacks than each others, and several turnips, arrows, PK Fires, and Lumas later, both were reduced to trophy form.

"Let's leave them for a moment to let them cool down, shall we?", Marth suggested.

No one objected.

* * *

 _ **AN- Today's chapter is brought to you by my latest playthrough of Awakening, where I married Inigo for a killer Morgan with Rightful King. His event tile dialogues are super sweet, and also I thought it would be funny for Lucina to react to her brother's alternate universe clone being Robin's husband, so that's why I decided to go with him here. Also, a thank you to SmashKing24, for featuring me as your Awesome Story of the Week. I am flattered by your holding this story in such high regards. Also, a thank you to Indigo Puff, a guest reviewer who has reviewed several of my stories and for whom I am very grateful. Kerosene is Kuro (Dark Pit) x Lucina, by the way, as said Indigo Puff asked. So, thanks for reading! –Twilight Joltik**_


	6. EX1: Dark Pit's Counteroffensive

_Random Encounters_

 _Chapter Six- EX 1: Dark Pit's Counteroffensive_

The day before Peach's game was a day like any other in the Smash Mansion. Time passed slowly, people did little of value in between fights, and Wario attempted to mug no less than seventeen people. Robin, or rather as he would later be known, "Reflet", was not among them, luckily. It seemed Wario hadn't caught word that he had the Golden Gaffe DLC that allowed for near limitless funds for his army to use on weapons and candy. Or rather, usually just candy thanks to Gaius and his daughter, who had inherited her father's sweet tooth in spades. Regardless, he was glad Wario didn't know of this.

"Reflet" was musing on how profoundly grateful he was that Wario left him alone when he suddenly heard a faint song. He would have been very curious as to what it was, to only figure out quickly that it was Jigglypuff. However, he could not be curious or quickly deduct the source, as he was asleep long before any coherent thought regarding it could be formed.

Luckily, the sleeping spell seemed to dissipate swiftly, and he awoke to realize that Jigglypuff had most likely been the cause of said nap. He also realized he was now in a dark, damp room that felt entirely too small, despite or perhaps because of the fact that he could not see the walls. "Reflet" groaned. "Lovely, it seems I've been kidnapped." After a moment, he added, louder this time, "Again!"

Most people would have panicked under these conditions. However, he realized pretty quickly that he was A) not tied up this time, and B) didn't seem to be in any sort of fiery dungeon. This was an improvement from the usual fare, and as he stood up slowly as to not accidentally bang his head on the ceiling, he hypothesized that it was not one of the Koopalings who had done this and rather someone else all together.

Despite being perfectly ready to fumble about until finding either a light switch or doorknob, "Reflet" was instead blinded by someone else turning on the lights. As the dazzled spots cleared from his eyes, he saw a certain dark-winged angel leaning against a wall that was far further away than his claustrophobic suspicions had let on. "No, actually, I did not, in fact, kidnap you," corrected Dark Pit after a moment of them staring each other down in silence. "I just needed to talk to you in private, and this seemed like the easiest way to do it."

"By having Jigglypuff knock me out and dragging me into a quiet, secluded room?", "Reflet" questioned. "This is your idea of inconspicuous?"

He was met with a shrug. "Actually, you were sort of passed out in the hallway," the dark angel explained. "Next to this closet."

"When you needed to talk to me?", "Reflet" asked with a raised eyebrow. "That seems awfully contrived."

"Not my fault the writer was handing me contrived situations to make me not look incredibly creepy." One of the walls let out a small cracking sound. "Ignore that," Dark Pit instructed.

Though "Reflet" did so, it was mainly because he was too scared to do otherwise. "So, why exactly did you need to talk to me?", the tactician inquired.

"You know about that stupid game Peach and your lady clone are playing, right?", began the dark-winged clone. "The one where they try to get couples together?"

Vaguely, "Reflet" did recall seeing notes for a possible pairing of Link and Samus in the other Robin's book of Shipping and Shipping by-products labeled "Get them together, beat Peach at her own game, ?, profit" or something to that effect. Therefore, he nodded and shared said information with Dark Pit.

"So you don't know about the couple Peach is trying to shove together, then?", pressed Pittoo. When "Reflet" failed to answer, he burst out with "She wants Lucina and Shulk to get together!"

Those words felt like a critical strike from a Silver Bow bearing through his chest, something he could say from experience was most unpleasant. The prospect of his two dearest friends at that place who were not Chrom being together hurt far more than he would have liked to admit. "Th-that would never work!", he attempted to laugh it off. "I mean, Lucina's said herself that she thinks of Shulk as a little brother, even though I think he's actually older than her, but that's beside the point. And I really can't imagine that'd work in the long run, considering, um, er-"

He searched for some reason it wouldn't work, but couldn't find anything he could put into words, much to his horror. Thankfully, Dark Pit cut him off before he had to admit that. "You don't have to go into details, we both know we can't allow that to happen."

"Why, 'cause you want Lucina to yourself?", "Reflet" suggested with a smirk. The blush that flashed on the angel's face was completely expected, given even a Zubat could see very clearly that Dark Pit acted like he couldn't care in the slightest about anyone but her. Well, anyone could see it except Lucina, considering she'd inherited her father's eye for the smitten.

Clenching his fist, Dark Pit assumed a smirk of his own and countered "Not any more than you want Shulk to yourself!"

Red started to eat away at his cheeks, but "Reflet" couldn't find the words to deny it. "I- I-" was all he could manage.

"So, we need to make a plan to assure Peach doesn't succeed," the dark angel began. "You got an invitation to that party thing she's doing, right? It sounds awful, but it seems like a good place to sabotage her plans. So, what's your plan."

"What makes you so sure I'm going to help you?", "Reflet" questioned. "And what makes you so sure I have a plan."

A dry laugh came from Dark Pit. "Well, for one, if you don't help me I'll tell Shulk who keeps carrying him back to our room whenever he falls asleep in the library," he threatened. A stone formed in "Reflet's" throat. He always sort of felt bad that he never told Shulk he did that, and that he'd make Dark Pit swear not to tell the seer this, but he also knew that it was very hard to say something like that without sounding like you were Tharja-levels of creepy and Dark Pit would make every attempt to make it sound as such. "And besides, I've played Awakening, I know you always have an idea."

That was true, and in fact, the ideas coming together for this plan at the back of his head were starting to sound rather fun. "Alright, I'm in," he agreed. "But I'll need a few things."

Dark Pit pulled out a pen and pad of paper. "Like-?"

"A pink apple, a golden apple, a red apple, a blue apple, Ridley, two glass jars with holes poked in their lids, a Sneaky Parasol, Eirika's Einherjar card- don't worry, I can supply that- a really terrible looking bug- any kind will do, so long as it's not a caterpillar- an ocarina, and a copy of the first issue of the Puella Magi Madoka Magica manga."

As Dark Pit struggled to write all of that, and had to ask "Reflet" to repeat himself a few times, he groaned "Anything else?" as he neared the end of the list.

"Some duct tape might be helpful," concluded the tactician.

* * *

 _ **AN- We will find out what all of that is for… LATER! (Hint: knowledge of Super Paper Mario will help here.) I think I'll start doing these side chapters every so often. Who knows, maybe I'll show one of Peach's crappy fanfictions in one. Or explain why Red hasn't been around. Thanks for reading! –Twilight Joltik**_


	7. Space Pineapple

_Random Encounters_

 _Chapter Seven- Space Pineapple_

Simply leaving the trophy-fied Robins on the floor, Peach started to read out the next one. As her eyes scanned it, a devious smile formed across her face. Ah, it was too perfect, and a flawless counter to both Robin's game and her own problems. Not to mention said Robin was out cold, so she couldn't be accused of foul play. "Alright, Link must marry the first person he sees, and it happens to be Rosalina!", she declared, suspiciously cheery. "What do you do?"

"I- um, I…" Link looked down and began to deeply contemplate the properties of the carpet fibers. "Well, she seems nice enough, I guess."

Rosalina gave a small chuckle of mocking amiability. "Oh, is that so? Well, do I have a say in this? And do we get to become better acquainted with each other first and then marry, or is it right away?"

"It's a hypothetical question, no details, just imagination," Peach explained with a groan, trying to suppress her desire to cackle victoriously. Oh yes, this could most certainly work. If she could force them together somehow, it would solve both of her problems at once, only leaving Dark Pit as the only threat to her plan. Perhaps, though, she could find a way to get him fed up enough to leave? (She didn't suspect that the bag that had fallen from Reflet as he'd jumped up to fight meant anything at this point, even when she caught Dark Pit shoving a pillow in front of it to obscure it.)

A bright red flush spread across Link's face. "Um, I don't know, but I'd want to get to know you first. I guess it doesn't matter either way, though, since we don't have any choice."

"Link, are you alright?", Rosalina suddenly asked, getting up and standing behind the Hylian, nearly tripping over Robin in the process. "You seem a bit on edge."

Gulping, Link seemed to have to force himself to look up. "Oh, it's fine, don't worry about it!", he assured her hollowly. "I'm just not used to hanging out with so many people who aren't Zelda or Shiek or Other Link. That's all. Nothing else is wrong. Er, you can sit down now…"

"Well, if you're certain you're fine, I'll leave you be." Rosalina began to practically glide back over to her seat, but hesitated as she passed the trophy tacticians once more. "Um, do you believe they're calmed down enough now?", she inquired.

Peach bit the inside of her lip to prevent herself from exploding. Rosalina was ruining things again, just like always. Luckily, someone else snarked back before she had a chance to. "Oh, come on!", Palutena protested. "Let's find a way to get them into factory-sealed packages! Robin's amiibo is worth tons, just think how much pizza they would buy! Plus, the girl one could pass as a really good custom, and that might be worth even more!"

"Yeah, and while we're at it, we can kill you too," Shulk dryly replied. "You're even more overpriced, not even Ness has been able to get a hold of you."

"Is that so?", Lucas questioned. "I'd thought he'd gotten every single one available! Or, at least, given how much they clutter our room, it feels as if he must have."

Palutena held her staff aloft for emphasis as she cried "All the more reason to sell them! We can use the proceeds for cinnamon sticks, and whatever's left to buy Ness a me amiibo! Wow, that sounded really weird, and Peach, is it too late to call in an order for cinnamon sticks."

Glancing at the time on her phone, Peach shook her head. "Sorry, but I think it should be here any minute. The website said 'Delivery is guaranteed in three chapters or less!', so-"

She was cut off by the wall making another sharp cracking. Everyone let out a collective shriek, and then decided to act as if it had never happened while silently praying they didn't all get ripped to shreds. "O-okay, next question!", Peach exclaimed, not noting that Lucina had used the chaos as an opportunity to revive the Robins. "Um, Pit tells Palutena a scary-"

A knock at the door cut her off, to which Palutena gleefully rose to answer. "Must be the pizza!", she cheerily declared. "I'll have a word with them about those cinnamon sticks."

However, as she opened the door, she jumped slightly as she laid eyes on the deliveryman: Wolf O'Donnell. "What in my name are you doing here?", she questioned.

"Delivering your freaking pizza, goddess lady," replied the space wolf.

"B-but why?", Palutena asked. "Weren't you a Smash Fighter?"

He shrugged as he entered the room and looked around for a place to set the pizza. "I was, but then they fired me," he explained. "And, well, I still had bills and a home in Space Florida to pay for, so I took the first job I could find."

"'Space Florida'?", Pit repeated. "What's 'Space Florida'? Is that like, the rocket place?"

A nostalgic delight gleamed in Wolf's eyes. "Oh, Space Florida is much better than Earth Florida or Outrealms Florida or Hyrule Florida or even Zebes Florida! It has automated sand!"

"What the heck is automated sand?", Reflet questioned, sitting uncomfortably in front of the bag. "Does that even make any sense?"

"Oh, but greater than any sand automation is the Space Pineapples!", Wolf decreed. "The most luscious, succulent, yellow fruit in all the galaxies! This 'pineapple', they do not seem to grow it anywhere else, but Space Pineapple is worth every cent! And no matter how many cents I must pay, I shall always do it for such a lovely fruit!"

Everyone stared at Wolf for a moment, wondering how the cold, rude fighter they'd known him as could be practically squeeing over pineapple of all things. "Uh, you know, pineapple is grown a lot of other places besides Space Florida," Ike informed him.

Wolf's eyes widened in shock. "Truly?"

"Yeah," Peach bluntly said. "You sell them on your pizzas."

"No one's ever ordered that," Wolf replied. "I thought those weird yellow chunks sort of looked like my beloved, but they tasted all wrong, like they'd been drowned in brine, and I just assumed it was a cheap imitation."

After a moment, Lucas provided "Er, I think there's some in the kitchen down the hall."

Wolf took off like a bullet, speeding out the door, simply dropping the pizza on the floor without asking for payment or anything, and certainly not minding Palutena's cry of "Hey, wait, I wanted to ask you about cinnamon sticks!"

* * *

 _ **AN- Thank you PrincessKatniss02 for giving me the idea of the new OTP, Wolf x Pineapple. I got it from her one-shot collection, Your Love is Music to My Heart, which is a beautiful Kerosene thing if anyone would like to check it out. Maybe the next side chapter will be about Wolf and his beloved. Also, Space Florida is from a thing, and internet cookies to anyone who recognizes it. Thanks for reading! –Twilight Joltik**_


	8. Joltik vs Blushing

_Random Encounters_

 _Chapter Eight- Joltik vs Blushing_

After it was clear Wolf was long gone, Palutena sat back down with a pouty look on her face and her arms crossed. However, she didn't stay there for even long enough for Peach to read the next question, as she quickly stood up and walked out, muttering "I can get my own *CRUMBS* Cinnamon Sticks!" under her breath. Everyone made very sure not to acknowledge the Narrator's censorship, despite it sounding hilarious, and just got up to get their pizza and sat back down.

(Unknown to the players, in a nearby room, Ness cheered. "Told you she'd be the first to leave!", he boasted to the others in that room. "Now pay up!" Wario then growled at him as he handed the young psychic money that was most likely counterfeit, for he had bet the kid a rather lot that Dark Pit would be the first to bail.)

Peach began to compose herself once more and read off the next question, but quickly realized with the goddess on a cinnamon stick run, that would be impossible. "Er, alright, so the next question involved Palutena, so I'll just skip that one for now," she reported. No one really cared, not even Pit, who knew he was the other person in said skipped question. "Okay, so Ro- er, Reflet is giving Ike a massage. Is this okay?"

Bright red spread across Reflet's face as the author realized she hadn't been coming up with many creative ways to say someone was blushing. She then decided to search the previous chapters to figure out how many times she'd described blushing in that precise manner. To her surprise, it was only four times, but that still seemed like a bit much, so she decided she'd try to think of better ways to say it.

Anyways, Reflet was burning up with embarrassment. "I-I- er, um," he stuttered out. "D-don't you think th-that'd be coming on a bit strong?", he questioned. "I mean, Lord Ike's already in love with the Hero King, Naga knows how that happened, and I don't want to make it seem as if I'm, er, how do I put this, breaking the bro-code?"

Ike simply shrugged in response. "I don't think that's really breaking the bro-code unless you're doing it to be flirty. If you're just trying to be nice, I'm sure Marth wouldn't care."

"Peach, that's a bit of a loaded question," Marth complained. "As your friend, I kindly ask you not to give the shippers any more ammo to use against my love life than they already have, and that includes those Ike x Reader self inserts you wrote a while back."

It was Peach's cheeks turn to blaze with the flame of mortification. She hadn't thought Marth had known her Fanfiction account name was xXPeachBlossomsXx, let alone read any of her stories. That one had been deleted ages ago, so how long had he been reading her stuff? Did he know about that one story she'd written about him and Roy? The way he was staring at her, with his eyebrows raised and frowning certainly implied so.

She quickly decided to change the next question, which involved him, to involve someone else, and it took less than three seconds to realize this could be worked to her advantage. Cheerily, she declared "Next question! Lucina is choking! Quick, what does Shulk do?"

"CPR," replied the seer flatly. "I mean, isn't that what you're supposed to do?"

Lucina gave a nod. "I would think that answer would be self-explanatory."

A huff of annoyance escaped Princess Peach's mouth. She had meant for it to come across as an invitation for something romantic, but before she could think of a way to make it so, Robin caught her eye and waggled her finger in a "nuh-uh~" motion, which sort of looked like a cross between Anna's finger-chin pose and Sonic's title screen waggle. So, she simply sighed and read out the next thing.

"Lucas and Link are locked in a closet together! What do they do?", she read, and Lucas gave her a look of utmost contempt while Link's face burned with the fury of a thousand PK Fires. The author then realized that her new-and-improved blush-metaphors were far worse than the original, and quickly decided to return to shades of red and forget the burning ones had ever been written.

"I- um, are you implying something?", Link questioned with a nervous shutter, and everyone stared at him, as his worry implied far more than Peach's question ever had. He realized this almost at once, and quickly facepalmed in response.

Palutena then reappeared in the room with a box of cinnamon sticks and proceeded to answer Peach's question. "Never mind, it seems Link just unlocked it!", she cheerily teased.

Link's feeble assurance of "I'm not actually gay, you know…" was lost to the clamor of everyone rushing to grab one of the cinnamon sticks the goddess had brought, and even if they had, all the guys would have been very sad over this, because even the straight ones could agree they'd gladly make out with Link.

This seemed to Peach to be a perfect time to switch subjects, before Lucas, or god forbid Rosalina went ballistic on her. "Okay, we can do the Palutena question now! Pit tells Palutena a scary story. What does Palutena do afterwards."

A mighty eye-roll came from the mighty goddess. "Nothing, because Pit's scary stories all suck."

"That's not true!", Pit shouted. "I have plenty of really scary stories!"

The goddess gave her servant a rather condescending look. "Oh really?", she questioned. "If so, then please, share it."

With a deep breath, Pit launched into an oddly deep voice and began to tell a story. "You're walking through the Lost Woods. There's no one around, and your guide fairy has gotten eaten by Timberwolves. Quite obviously, you're lost." ("Must be if you saw Timberwolves," Dark Pit dryly added, getting jabbed by Shulk in the arm for his efforts.) "And then," Pit continued. "Out of the corner of your eye, you spot him: Waluigi."

"Yeah, we've heard enough," Palutena interrupted. "Like I said, you can't do horror."

"Wait, I'm not done!", protested Pit. "I haven't even gotten to the interpretive dance or the part about the bear trap! Come on, I had a choral arrangement and everything!"

The idea of an interpretive dance was close enough to horror that Palutena decided to sent Pit flying through the roof with the Power of Flight to save face, and also the vestiges of sanity clinging to a select few in the room.

* * *

 _ **AN- If the Link joke was offensive in any way, I'm sorry. I didn't mean it to be so. In other news, I've actually made an account on here with the name Peach gave, and I'll probably be using it as a Peach roleplay account. Not saying I plan to post any of her terrible Yaoi fics on there, but I might. Also, everyone seemed to think that Space Florida was a reference to Dragonball Z Abridged, which I know nothing about. Actually, it was a reference to Doctor Who, as the location was briefly mentioned in the Season 5 finale of the revived series. However, Pit's "horror story" was another reference, and maybe I won't have accidentally made it sound like one to something else this time. Thanks for reading! –Twilight Joltik**_


	9. Robin Screws Up Everything

_Random Encounters_

 _Chapter Nine- Robin Screws Up Everything_

With nary another look at the gaping, Pit-shaped hole in the ceiling, the game went on. "So, Lucina and I swap bodies," she continued on. "How well do we do with the swap?"

Both Peach and Lucina stared blankly at the walls for a moment, trying to picture this and coming up with absolutely nothing to say. "Uh," Lucina finally managed to force out after a minute. "I- I don't know. Honestly, if I just dyed my- er, her hair blue, it wouldn't be all that different, right?"

"Eh, I guess I'd have weaker magic or something?" Peach mused. "Sorry, I'm drawing a blank on this one."

A wickedly crooked grin came to Robin's face. She had an idea: an awful idea. An wonderful, awful idea. "Well, if you can't really picture it, and given I seem to have Shadowgift in this world, I think I might be able to help you," she offered, producing a thick tome from her cloak with a gift tag dangling from it reading "To my love, from Tharja". Reflet made a move as if to stop her, but she'd already read the incantation by the time he'd gotten up. Her cry of "Temere Transitus Tempus!" echoed through the room, and a burst of light came from either the book or her hand- it was impossible to say which.

Quickly, the light cleared, and everyone began to let out sighs of relief, for it seemed nothing had happened. Then, slowly at first, then all at once, there was total panic, as the Smashers realized A) they were not where they had been before Robin had cast the spell and B) they were not who they were before Robin had cast the spell.

To properly demonstrate what exactly had occurred, it is best if we cut now to Ness, who, like many other Smashers, had been happily watching Peach's group make fools of themselves from a safe distance via hidden cameras. Upon seeing this flash of light, he dismissed it at first as some silly parlor trick Robin had done as a punchline to a joke he hadn't quite been paying attention to. Everyone else quickly passed it off as nothing as well, just like Ness would have had he not sensed the strangest psychic disturbance he'd felt since Giygas. Things felt scrambled to him, and the familiar voices in the room he was watching were all coming out wrong. And so, he quickly ran around in a circle to teleport into the commons room where the game had been thrown into chaos.

Upon entering, many eyes fell upon him, but much to his shock, Marth was the one who ran to him, tears filling his blue eyes. Ness flinched, as Marth had never cried in front of him nor stood so close to him willingly before. "Ness!", cried the prince in a voice lacking every last drop of its normal refine. "I'm so glad you're here! Something happened, and I can't feel a thing, and everything just feels off, a-a-and…"

"Agh, shut up!", Lucas interrupted loudly, with absolutely none of his normal politeness. "You're all so loud! All of you, and Link especially, for Naga's sake, would you calm down?" Without missing a beat, Lucas strode towards Ness and cried out "Is it always like this for you? Good gods, how do you live in that brain?"

To drown out the great psychic inhibitor known as sight, Ness closed his eyes. He really had to concentrate to figure out what was going on. Everyone was crying out all at once, but if he concentrated on Lucas, or at least the person who had come up to him bearing Lucas's face, most definitely felt like the person he knew as Prince Marth. Likewise, the sobbing "Marth" next to him, if he concentrated, could most definitely be identified as Lucas. In other words, the two had swapped bodies somehow, and if he truly concentrated, he could identify that similar swaps had occurred to everyone in the room save two. Of course, he, who had just arrived was excluded, but it seemed the one who had cast the spell that had led to this was as well.

Speaking of which, Robin tapped him on the shoulder, snapping him out of his attempts to discern the swaps that had taken place. "Hey, can you fix this?", she asked with a note of panic in her voice. "'Cause I thought I was casting a spell to switch two peoples' bodies, and somehow all of this happened," she explained, gesturing to the swapped chaos throughout the room.

Slowly, Ness shook his head. "No, I have absolutely no idea how I could even begin to fix this," he admitted. "I'm not really a hexing kind of person. Did you mess the spell up somehow?"

Robin flipped furiously through the tome she held and let out a pained gasp as her eyes fell on something. "It- it says here that this was supposed to make the user change places with a single target! I was trying to cast it on Lucina and Peach, not myself, so that must have been how it messed up."

"That's what I was trying to tell you!", Palutena (or rather, Reflet in Palutena's body) yelled at Robin from halfway across the room. "I've seen Henry use that curse before, and it was to swap his body with Sumia's, so I knew that wasn't how you were supposed to use it! Would it kill you to listen to me, maybe?"

Though she pointedly looked away from Palutena-Reflet in shame, Robin seemed to have some sort of epiphany, as her eyes lit up and she quickly pulled out a cell phone. "Okay, then! I can call Henry to come fix everything!" she declared, and a shiver of fear ran through the room.

"Henry?", repeated Lucina-in-Peach's-body. "Do you really think that's the best idea?"

Robin shouted back "Do you have any better ones?" and received no answer. She then punched a number into her phone and stepped out of the room, leaving Ness as the only person in their proper body present.

Closing his eyes, he tried to make out who and where everyone was again, and pulled out a pad of paper and pencil to record it. It seemed that it was definite swaps instead of random changing, and that each person had the body of the person who had theirs, which made things a bit simpler. Still, he supposed, there was no good way to tell who was who from the onset, so he requested the following very loudly: "Anyone have any sticky notes?"

Palutena-in-Reflet's-body quickly produced some from a large bag she was holding, and Reflet-in-Palutena's-body seemed a bit nervous about the fact that she had that bag. Ness didn't care too much about that, as he wrote the names of all present on a sticky note and went around the room to the slightly more settled Smashers and gave them the sticky note with their name on it.

Eyes began to flit about the room and read the notes stuck to people's heads or clothing (mostly heads), with much snickering abound. Even if people were distressed about their own situation, at least they could find comfort in the fact that Roy and Ike had traded bodies, and that was hilarious.

"I'm guessing Robin will be a little while," Peach-in-Lucina's-body began, shuffling papers she had snatched from her proper body. "So, we should probably just continue with the game until she fixes it. Where were we- how would Lucina and I handle switching bodies?"

Lucina-in-Peach's-Body replied with a very deadpan "Very badly."

* * *

 _ **AN- Yay body swapping! Overcomplicating things FTW! I'm sorry, I just remembered Sumia and Henry's supports when I was reading over the question line-up, and the idea of Robin accidentally switching everyone's bodies made me laugh so hard that I decided I had to do it. Don't worry, they'll get this resolved quickly, I assure you, but until then, here's a chart of the swaps:**_

 _ **Palutena-Reflet**_

 _ **Roy-Ike**_

 _ **Marth-Lucas**_

 _ **Peach-Lucina**_

 _ **Shulk-Dark Pit**_

 _ **Link-Rosalina**_

 _ **Thanks for reading! –Twilight Joltik**_


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